What I have learned after 4 months of not drinking alcohol
The Sober Journey

20 Things I have learned after 4 months of not drinking alcohol

I can’t believe it has been 4 months since I made the monumental decision to stop drinking alcohol forever.

For over twenty years I had drank red wine pretty much every day, usually a bottle a night, sometimes often more. As the years went by my dependency got worse and it started to dawn on me that alcohol had a pretty tight grip on my life.

I used to like to think I was in control and I could stop whenever I wanted, how wrong I was, deep down I knew the truth.

Thankfully I managed to break free and in July 2018 I put the bottle down for good, I have not touched a drop of alcohol since and I never will again.

It was hard at first, but as the weeks rolled by it became easier, in fact it became fun and I started to love the experience of being sober.

So what have I learned from four months of not drinking alcohol?

  1. I have learned that my awful anxiety was caused by drinking wine, a few weeks after I stopped drinking my anxiety faded away and has been at ‘normal’ levels ever since.
  2. I have learned what waking up refreshed after a restful nights sleep feels like. There I was thinking alcohol helped me sleep, it might have knocked me out but there was no restful sleeping, no wonder my eyes used to be dark and I felt tired all the time when I was drinking.
  3. I have learned how to find peace, for the first time in a long time I feel a sense of peace and calm in my life. Probably because my day no longer revolves around wine o’clock.
  4. I have learned to be grateful and thankful for the gift of sobriety and all the wonderful people and things I have in my life.
  5. I have learned that there are loads of amazing alcohol-free drinks and I love them! Ceders, Seedlip, Tonic Water, GinSin, lovely!
  6. I have learned that my tongue is actually pink, not dark purple (now the red wine stains have gone).
  7. I have learned to relax when I am driving on the school run in the morning, I am not over the drink-drive limit.
  8. I have learned that I can still laugh and have fun without alcohol inside me, I used to think I needed wine to have fun but these days I laugh more than ever.
  9. I have learned that thousands of people are struggling with their own relationship with alcohol, the growth of the Be Sober private Facebook group has been incredible and gives me a clear insight into the number of people who want to make a change.
  10. I have learned that some of my friends have a problem with their own relationship with alcohol, a couple of them have even joined the Be Sober Facebook group, well done to you guys for taking a positive step.
  11. I have learned that people on the sober-journey are among the most caring, compassionate and non-judgmental people you could ever know.
  12. I have learned why my face was bloated and blotchy, it isn’t now.
  13. I have learned that I can have fun going out sober and how much I enjoy driving home (and getting into bed) after a night out.
  14. I have learned that a night out is fun regardless of alcohol, if it is a boring event it is still boring whether you are drinking or not, the alcohol makes no difference.
  15. I have learned to look out for other people, since I have been sober I have started doing community work helping local vulnerable people and also work on my blog and Facebook group every day. Giving back feels good and gives me a sense of purpose. Hm, I can feel another blog post coming on entitled ‘do I give back to help other people, or to help myself’, both I think…
  16. I have learned not to judge, everyone has a different story and everyone needs support and help to make their way on the sober-journey.
  17. I have learned to care less about money, it used to be pretty much all that motivated me (along with making sure I had a supply of red wine). Now I don’t care so much about it, so long as I am comfortable I am fine, I am more interested in being happy, sober and feeling a sense of peace and calm.
  18. I have learned to enjoy family time again, wine took this away from me and made me argue and be snappy with my son. Since I quit drinking our relationship has grown stronger than ever and I enjoy spending time together and going out and about as a family so much more than when I was drinking.
  19. I have learned that not everyone will be as excited about the joy of sobriety as I am, in fact, I have discovered a few friendships were based mainly around alcohol and have ended up having question them.
  20. I have learned that my close family and true friends are supportive and proud of what I have achieved. I also learned that most of them didn’t realise I had a problem with alcohol.

That is a lot of learning in just four months, they have truly been the most amazing few months and I am so happy to have been able to make this change and improve my life for the better in so many ways.

If you are reading this and struggling with your own relationship with alcohol please join the Be Sober private Facebook group where you will find support, advice and encouragement to help you on your own sober-journey.







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  1. Heather says:

    Thank you Simon. Once again a great read. Made me think of all my postives too 🙂 Your blogs are like mini positive top ups that i look forward to reading as well as Alcohol Explained although I’m finding his voice on audio very serious. I think i prefer more light hearted approach with the stories behind like Unexpected joy of being sober cheers H 🙂

  2. freeatlast says:

    My pleasure, I am glad you enjoy the posts. I am planning on a few more videos and I have a couple of superb interviews lined up which you will enjoy! Simon.

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