An addiction in essence is the urge to do something which you find extremely hard or impossible to control or limit. Addictions come in many different guises and affects each person in different ways. Whether this is an addiction to gambling through to alcohol, the feelings remain relatively the same; being that you would prefer to continue with the addiction as you can’t stop or you do not understand you are addicted, although you know it is damaging to your health and happiness. Not just for you, but for those that are close to you as well.

I come from a place of experience as I, for many years had an addiction to alcohol, in particular, wine. I still do, it took me a long time to accept that I was in the grips of an addiction and even now I still have to plan my days carefully to protect my sobriety. I am unable to limit the alcohol I have as the drug starts to take over and before I know it, a glass turns to a bottle and so on. I therefore, made the commitment to remove alcohol from my life altogether. It was the best decision I have ever made and the reason for starting Be Sober is that I want to be able to help as many people as I can who are also addicted to alcohol.

From my own addiction to alcohol, I know that I had adopted certain habits which increased my need and want to drink. It took me a while to realise that I had to break these habits for good to successfully remain sober. I wanted to share some of these with you which I hope help you if you are starting your sobriety journey or if you are struggling to remain sober.

#1 Make the change with no excuses

If drinking has become a daily habit for you which has turned into an addiction, where you can’t imagine not having a drink at some point in your day, then one of the most effective starting methods I found was stopping altogether. This of course is easier said than done. However, if you have decided that you want to completely remove alcohol from your life, then test yourself to see if you can go a day without booze. Shocking your system by breaking the habit can be extremely effective and the first stepping stone to real change.

#2 Understand your triggers

What I mean by triggers, is certain situations that you put yourself in or are put in where you would normally be drinking. For example, I could never make a meal without having a glass of wine by my side. I couldn’t settle for the evenings without knowing I had had at least a bottle of wine throughout the night. After all, I deserved it after a hard day at work, right?! It’s really important to know what triggers you to drink so you can try to avoid those situations at much as possible. Especially when you are embarking on your road to recovery, where falling back into bad drinking habits can be all too easy.

#3 Replace the old with the new

Habit breaking is extremely hard. It takes a lot of willpower and a genuine desire for change. It’s not something you can be forced to do by others, you have to want to do it for yourself. However, I am a strong advocate of making the process as stress-free as possible. This isn’t all just about removing things from your life that you use to enjoy. It’s also about finding new things in your life that bring you pleasure but are not physically or mentally harmful. Bad habits love idle minds, so occupying yourself is critical. This is the right time to take up a new activity that you enjoy doing, whether that’s exercise, reading, painting, spending meaningful time with your family. Whatever it is you choose to do, embrace it fully and enjoy every moment. You can replace those bottles of booze in your home for some lovely alcohol-free options. Have some that are your daily go-to options then splash out and having some fancier alcohol-free options for when you want a treat.

#4 Take control of your surroundings

It is extremely difficult to cut ties with those who do not support your sobriety journey, after all, these people may be friends you have known for many years or family who raised you since you were a child. However, your surroundings and in particular those who surround you, will play a pinnacle role in your long-term recovery. You will need people by your side who will help you when you are at your weakest and most vulnerable, not those who will sense your weakness and use that as the perfect opportunity to get “their old pal” back for a good ole knees up. It’s going to be hard, but you want to enjoy every moment of your life, it isn’t good enough to just coast through life in a haze and denial.

#5 Forgive yourself

One thing all addicts have in common is they have done things whilst in the mist of their addictions that they regret. Some actions will be worse than others, you may have said or done things that have a negative impact on others, they may find it in their hearts to forgive you and they may not. One thing that is for sure is that you need to learn to forgive yourself. Use your past offending actions as a learning opportunity, constantly beating yourself up over the past is more likely to harm rather than help your recovery. This is something that is likely to take a long time to become a habit, take it step-by-step and it will get easier over time.

Breaking the habit of drinking or the activities you use to (or currently) do that would trigger you to drink is tough, you can only take it a day at a time and congratulate yourself along each step. It may only be a small step you take each day, but the long-term impact is likely to be much greater.